You know how it is, you've been together forever, and now maybe you feel like as a couple don't click like you used to in the beginning. As life happens, you might hit a rough patch along the way.
The tips that we're sharing with you today are all tested by us as a couple, and by others before us, and can truly help strengthen your relationship.
But first, a little bit about us.
Let's get personal for a second. My husband Andy and I, being Maya, met in 2012, and after 3 short weeks of being friends, we went on our first date.
Back then we were both young, just having fun, just getting over our failed relationships. We were not looking for something serious, and we used to say that our hearts are like rocks, that we can't feel anything, and all that crap, you know, texts.
Looking back, it's actually funny, because now we are like Marshall and Lilly, from How I Met Your Mother. Co-dependent, crazy about each other, and we can't spend one night away from each other.
We actually moved in together after just one week, and we don't regret that one bit!
We've been through so much together, it sometimes feels like a few lifetimes actually, not just one. We've started a business and failed, we moved 2000 miles away from home, first to Spain, and now, we're in Scotland. Who knows where we're going next?!
What kept us together, besides our ever growing love for each other, is what is on the list we're sharing with you today.
But enough with the chit-chatting! Let's get to it!
20 simple things you can do to make your relationship better
1. Don't nag
This is the worst thing you can do to your partner. I know that it's hard to come home and see the dirty dishes still in the sink, and your loved one sitting on the laptop just playing World of Warcraft, or online shopping, and the first thing in your mind is: "Really?" and rage.
But don't let that be your reflex. You don't know what they have been through today, maybe they needed a breather first. It doesn't mean that they won't do it. Instead of nagging, give a kiss, and have patience.
2. Do more stuff together
Even though you may have a ton in common, maybe your hobbies are not always the same. Maybe you like reading, while he/she loves painting. That doesn't mean that you can't have more activities in common.
Have game nights, cook together, share your hobbies! (P.S. That's how Andy got into cooking more and I got into building and painting stuff.)
3. Dance with each other
You don't have to leave your apartment for that if you're on a tight budget and can't afford a night out. Simply create a romantic atmosphere in your living room - candles, music, perfume in the air- and dance away.
This way you won't feel bad, even if you have two left feet! It's just you, and your partner.
4. Travel
Many couples that travel have said that this is one of the best ways of spending time together. When you travel, especially to a new place, it makes you happy, and that makes your partner happy (you know, "happy wife, happy life" kind of deal).Plus, as a couple, you have benefits! From never being alone and having that sense of protection, to sometimes getting deals on your travels!
5. Have new experiences together
I remember when Marshall and Lilly from HIMYM had this problem, that they will never have new things - like the first kiss, the first time, and all that, and that is something that most couples feel at some point in their relationship.
If you have the resources take a cooking class together, go and feed some penguins at the zoo, learn how to climb mountains together. As an "old" couple, aka if you have been together for a long time, you need to have new experiences together, they keep your mind healthy and your spirit energized.
6. Talk A LOT
And not just talk for the sake of talking, but listen, and communicate. Share ideas, tell your partner about your day, even if you don't go into all the details that you know might bore the other person.
Couples that don't talk to each other don't last. Period.
7. Say "I Love You!" often
It might not seem like much, but it's sure nice to hear it, especially when you don't expect it. Like, when you're cooking something and you're concentrated, having your partner whisper "I love you" just makes even your food taste better !Don't make it a programmed thing, like in the morning or at night and only then. Be spontaneous! Like Stevie Wonder said, I just called to say "I love You"...
8. Marvin Gaye (and get it on)
This is probably one of the best things you can do, that can have an immediate positive effect on your relationship if you do it right.
Here is where you can combine the "have new experiences together" point of our discussion as well. You can get into what each of you likes, and explore that, make it interesting.
9. Sleep naked together
There are many benefits of sleeping naked, even if you are solo, and we'll cover them in an article at some point, but let's focus on the couples now. There are numerous studies that show that couples who sleep together naked are simply happier.
The idea behind this is pretty simple: you are skin on skin, you feel each other better, you can enjoy each other's scent much better. There are no barriers between you two. And of course, you can balance your body temperature better, so it's an excuse for you who is always cold to get hot, hot, hot!
10. Show affection often
When I say, show affection, I don't mean buy expensive shit for him/her. Like my future mom in law likes to say, pinch each other gently, kiss each other when the other least expect it, give hugs, hugs and more hugs!
When you're in public, hold each other's hand, and if you don't want to gross your friends out with your kissing like horny teenagers, just a small kiss on the cheeks is a great way of showing your love for each other.
11. Stand united
Even if you're young and you don't have kids yet, it's still important to work as a team and stand together, no matter what. Don't let external factors come between you, be they parents, friends or life circumstances.
Parents will probably be protective, especially if you're dating a momma's boy, and dads can go all "bad boys" first date scene on you if she's the daddy's girl. Friends don't always agree, but after a while, things change.It's important to put your relationship first, and both of you to think about what's important for you as a couple.
12. Date your partner
After years and years, after life happens, monotony in a relationship hits, inevitably. To get out of the rut that might damage your relationship, you need to date!... not somebody else, but your partner.
Go to movies, have some drinks, have picnics, or you could even go and play a paintball game. Whatever makes you, or your loved one happy.
13. Be best friends
One of the most important things you can do in a relationship is to be besties with your loved one. Share everything with your partner - from thoughts to what you ate for lunch!
It's okay to have your girlfriends for the shopping trips, and your boys for gaming nights, but all the secrets, fears, and aspirations, you need to keep them for your bestie, your partner in life. That's what strengthens your bond.
14. Play together
And when I say "play", I'm not talking only about in the bedroom kind of play. Although, that does work magic sometimes, believe me. By "play together" I mean be kids together! Play board games, strategy games, all Blizzard and Warhammer games, if you're into that.
It's important to let loose once in a while and take advantage of your free time together, especially if you don't have other responsibilities like kids of your own.
15. Appreciate each other
Take your time to show your appreciation for one another. This is a good thing we've learned along the way. By simply saying "thank you" for small stuff like washing the dishes, or taking out the trash, or giving each other one compliment each day, or buying one rose once in a while, for no reason will work.
You'll help create confidence in your loved one, and that leads to happiness.
16. Focus on the positive
Let's face it. Couples fight. I've read somewhere that fighting once in a while is actually good for you and your relationship, but it's important to focus on the positive, even in that situation.
Don't attack each other where you know it hurts, don't bring up ancient history, and keep in mind that you probably fight because of something really unimportant or a misunderstanding.
After all, you love each other, so remind yourself why that is, before you consider broken something that is just bent.
17. Both of you can wear the pants
Egos can break any relationship. As a personal advice, don't try to boss or "parent" your partner. Yes, there will be situations where one of you will take the lead, but it is okay to have a balance of power between you two.
18. Have common goals
If you're in it for the long run, you must make sure that you have important life goals in common. From having x number of kids and when, to where do you want to live, pets or no pets, and all of that. If you don't know how to do that, think of it like the "where do you see yourself in 5 years?" question from a job interview, but focused on you as a couple.
19. Move in together (preferably alone)
You don't have to be married to live together, it's not the Middle Ages anymore. I'm not saying you should move in together after a week (like us two crazies!!), but you should live together for a while before even thinking of getting married and riding into the sunset.
By moving in together you learn everything about each other - likes, dislikes, quirks and habits.
20. Never go to sleep angry at each other
This is the golden rule I've learned from my grandparents, that I will keep for the rest of my life. This advice is coming from a couple that has been together for over 50 years, 'till death parted them in 2016 when my grandad tragically lost the battle with cancer
.Even if you have a small fight, you need to apologize and give each other a good night kiss before falling asleep. If not, you will wake up still upset, and that will screw up all your vibe for the day.
Swallow your pride, calm down, focus on the positive, and you will save yourself from a headache tomorrow.
Aaaaan that's all for today, lovely dreamers! We hope you enjoyed our list of ideas about how you can make your relationship better, and if you've made it this far, don't forget to share it, pin it, tweet it! We'll love you even more if you do!
Our question for you is: What is the best relationship advice you received?